Have you ever noticed how a compliment is difficult to accept and even harder to believe?
Did you know that there are actual step-by-step tutorials on how to accept a compliment and why you should.
- Understand what deflecting a compliment is really about.
- Think about taking a compliment as an exercise in being assertive.
- See accepting a compliment as a compliment in itself.
- Decide how you’d like to take the compliment
- If you suspect that the sincerity of the compliment is questionable or the compliment is confusing, you might want to open up an opportunity to explore it.
- Return a compliment later.
- Give credit where credit is due.
I read through all of this and while it made me laugh for the common-sense of it, it does have a valid point – accepting a compliment with sincerity and appreciation is difficult.
Likewise, I feel very self-conscious giving out compliments. I worry that people will take it the wrong way, or will think I’m flirting or that I’m trying to sell something.
That’s kind of sad isn’t it? In a world that could use a lot more compliments and a lot fewer criticisms, people struggle to give and receive them.
So I challenged my Go-To-Gals to write out three compliments for each of the other women.
It could be a single word, a sentence, or an entire paragraph – whatever it took to genuinely compliment someone.
The only criteria was that they not rely on the ‘standards’ – smart and/or beautiful.
Those were givens. (I have amazing friends – what can I say?)
I asked that they put the printed compliments in my mailbox anonymously so that even I didn’t know who had written what.
I thought this would be easy.
That it would only take a few minutes of time.
I have to tell you – it’s hard!
All of my friends have so many incredible qualities – but sitting down and writing it out in a sincere and heartfelt way was a real challenge.
Just think about what you love about someone – now try to put it in writing… eloquently.
The thesaurus came out more than a few times that’s for sure!
I cut up the sheets and delivered envelopes of compliments to the indicated recipients.
Can I tell you, that not only was I flattered and touched by the compliments I received, but I am absolutely GLOWING from the responses I got from the compliments others received.
It is an amazing feeling to know that a few words on a piece of paper had such a positive impact. That happy tears were shed, people felt “seen”, and friendships were strengthened further.
I’ve even had (multiple) requests to do this more often.
So I say to you, my readers, write out some sincere and heartfelt compliments and drop them off anonymously…. you have no idea how powerful that simple act will be to those you touch.
To my friends (that participated and those that didn’t) – you are cherished far more than you know.